#10…Me -vs- the Scale…February 2008

Immediately after I wrote last month that I wasn’t going to weigh myself, I weighed myself. (As if you didn’t know I’d do that.) I waited about thirty minutes…but only because that was how long it took me to drive to the nearest scale which was at my best friend’s house. 168 pounds. I chuckle slightly. The thing about household scales is they are so inaccurate. I will just sit tight until my next Weight Watcher meeting. The thin lady behind the counter hands me my weight tracker card. 168 pounds. I gasp silently. I have the overwhelming urge to throw my purse on the floor, stomp my foot, and call the skinny lady a liar. I want to point, disgusted, at the scale, and yell, “YOU! try to sabotage Me!” But, experience has taught me to be graceful in the most distressful situations. I pat my hair, putting in place any stray curls, smile, and walk into the meeting. I take the saved seat between two of my best friends and quickly begin to over-analyze the situation. They remark how great it is that i didn’t gain that much over the holidays. I decide they are right. Secretly, I was terrified that I had gained back all the weight. Secretly, I thought I was back up to 202. By the end of February I am at 159.8 pounds. I have finally broken out of the 160s that held me captive for so long, (the way a Law and Order marathon does). I can see the light at the end of my tunnel. I feel fabulous with a capital FAB. I do something I’ve always wanted to do. I get an expensive haircut…I chop all of my hair off into a neat curly afro with auburn highlights. (I had always wanted short hair, but would put if off for “when I lose weight”) I make myself a huge breakfast to celebrate and eat it on my porch…I close my eyes and take in a deep breath of joy…my spirit is full. My belly is full…I wonder if I ate too much…I smile as I say aloud, “hey, a skinny girl’s got to eat…”